Having been involved in a very long drawn out move all summer, I am on hiatus until October.
DHA
Wednesday, September 16, 2009
Monday, April 27, 2009
Sabbath Rest or Sabbath Party
It was a hard Lent for me this year. I struggled with obedience at all levels. The simplest impulse from the Spirit found me chafing at the instructions.
Just so you can feel a bit dismissive, because it is the rare pulpit that does not discount my particular form of fasting, let me confess I give up chocolate for Lent each year. It is the one substance that truly keeps me from seeking God in deeper ways. Once a day, more faithfully than I am in the Word sometimes, I open the paper to break off two ounces of Trader Joe's 72% dark chocolate bar. I delight in the antioxidants. I relish the part that melts on my fingers. I thank God for sustenance in all manner, shape and form as I consume it. Since Lent is about opening up the door to God's presence more, that's what I have always done without. I have a God moment when I eat my chocolate. The point of my Lenten fast is to have the God moment without the physical trigger. Yea, right.
Each year there is an astounding spiritual insight, epiphany if you will, as a result. So each year I give it up again. The first time I gave it up I had an enormous insight into the nature and depth of the act of Hosanna. I understood for the first time what it meant to praise God no matter what. I remember the literal spot in the road where it crashed in on me. Ah... it was so worth going without. Each year I look forward to what the Lord will teach me in the abyss of emptiness going without my daily pleasure and comfort brings me.
It is an arduous fast. Within days, I am consuming every other form of sugar at ever unsatisfying levels of consumption. It drives me to an unprecedented awareness of my flesh and God's infinite Glory. What a weakling I am.
This year on Ash Wednesday I went to the combined services at the Methodist church here on our little Island. The pastor said something that altered my practice of Lent. A simple statement, he noted the importance of feast days.
So I tried keeping a feast day this Lent. Guess what. First week out...Radical life changing, theologically jarring, ohmygosh how could I have gotten this so cattywhumpus for so long, epiphany.
Suddenly Lent was not a forty day plus the Sundays endurance test. It was a week, and then a day of rejoicing. Guess what? Not once did I binge on chocolate. I chose one piece very carefully and savoured it like the host.
Like all the other lessons I've learned in Lent's past, I continue this wisdom as well. Sunday has become a feast day. Quite the 45 degree turn from the day of service and contemplation ( and a well deserved nap in my opinion) of all the years before. Sunday is now the day I celebrate God's presence in my life. I feast. I surrender care and worry. I rejoice. I indulge spiritually, socially, physically, in all ways. God is God and I am not. Praise Be!! Blessed Be the Name!!!
Now think about what your day is like on Sunday, the Sabbath. You begin it the night before by not staying up too late even if you haven't finished your sermon. Then you rise early and tweak a few things, square away your family concerns and head for the church. Did you remember to put your piety on? You know, the smile, the handshake, the nod of the head, the voice and resulting inflections? What if it was this? You rise early and make the family French Toast or Pancakes having prepared early in the week and let the Lord ferment your discernments like yeast in good dough. With all smiles all, you arrive at the church as if you were headed to the biggest party in town. Rejoicing in the faces you see, you let all the joy you feel in belonging to the Lord overflow. It is your most real day! It is your most transparent day ! It is your most human day! I mean really, what would happen. Could it happen? Might it happen? Feast again on all that the Lord has given you in calling you to full time service.
Love
Deborah
Just so you can feel a bit dismissive, because it is the rare pulpit that does not discount my particular form of fasting, let me confess I give up chocolate for Lent each year. It is the one substance that truly keeps me from seeking God in deeper ways. Once a day, more faithfully than I am in the Word sometimes, I open the paper to break off two ounces of Trader Joe's 72% dark chocolate bar. I delight in the antioxidants. I relish the part that melts on my fingers. I thank God for sustenance in all manner, shape and form as I consume it. Since Lent is about opening up the door to God's presence more, that's what I have always done without. I have a God moment when I eat my chocolate. The point of my Lenten fast is to have the God moment without the physical trigger. Yea, right.
Each year there is an astounding spiritual insight, epiphany if you will, as a result. So each year I give it up again. The first time I gave it up I had an enormous insight into the nature and depth of the act of Hosanna. I understood for the first time what it meant to praise God no matter what. I remember the literal spot in the road where it crashed in on me. Ah... it was so worth going without. Each year I look forward to what the Lord will teach me in the abyss of emptiness going without my daily pleasure and comfort brings me.
It is an arduous fast. Within days, I am consuming every other form of sugar at ever unsatisfying levels of consumption. It drives me to an unprecedented awareness of my flesh and God's infinite Glory. What a weakling I am.
This year on Ash Wednesday I went to the combined services at the Methodist church here on our little Island. The pastor said something that altered my practice of Lent. A simple statement, he noted the importance of feast days.
So I tried keeping a feast day this Lent. Guess what. First week out...Radical life changing, theologically jarring, ohmygosh how could I have gotten this so cattywhumpus for so long, epiphany.
Suddenly Lent was not a forty day plus the Sundays endurance test. It was a week, and then a day of rejoicing. Guess what? Not once did I binge on chocolate. I chose one piece very carefully and savoured it like the host.
Like all the other lessons I've learned in Lent's past, I continue this wisdom as well. Sunday has become a feast day. Quite the 45 degree turn from the day of service and contemplation ( and a well deserved nap in my opinion) of all the years before. Sunday is now the day I celebrate God's presence in my life. I feast. I surrender care and worry. I rejoice. I indulge spiritually, socially, physically, in all ways. God is God and I am not. Praise Be!! Blessed Be the Name!!!
Now think about what your day is like on Sunday, the Sabbath. You begin it the night before by not staying up too late even if you haven't finished your sermon. Then you rise early and tweak a few things, square away your family concerns and head for the church. Did you remember to put your piety on? You know, the smile, the handshake, the nod of the head, the voice and resulting inflections? What if it was this? You rise early and make the family French Toast or Pancakes having prepared early in the week and let the Lord ferment your discernments like yeast in good dough. With all smiles all, you arrive at the church as if you were headed to the biggest party in town. Rejoicing in the faces you see, you let all the joy you feel in belonging to the Lord overflow. It is your most real day! It is your most transparent day ! It is your most human day! I mean really, what would happen. Could it happen? Might it happen? Feast again on all that the Lord has given you in calling you to full time service.
Love
Deborah
Monday, March 23, 2009
The Big Muffin
Standing by the backside of the altar, my little cherubs, in preparation for their chime choir contribution to worship, were pulling themselves together after rehearsal. The congregation was filing in. The low buzz of pre worship conversations was intensifying.
With all the second grade inquisitiveness she could muster, one of the little angels who belonged to another church turned quickly to me and asked, "What's the big muffin for?"
She is the one who always volunteers to pray and displays all the authentic desire to be connected and in conversation with God she can muster.
Distracted by my last minute duties to the choir , I turned to see what she was talking about.
There it sat. The communion loaf.
"Ah...the Big Muffin" I exclaimed inwardlywith a joyful sigh of relief in my heart as I realized it was communion Sunday. "We will eat in later in the service as a reminder that Jesus loves us" I explained simply.
Her nomenclature of the most sacred metaphor of God's sacrifice for us reminded me how much I love conversing with new or non believers about faith and the elements of faith. We are so wedded to church culture and churchspeak and church tradition, we forget the uninitiated can sometimes bring the sharpest clarity to our faith.
The Big Muffin, indeed. That's what he died for. So we could eat the Big Muffin. Every time we eat the Big Muffin and slurp the Big Cup, we humble ourselves to the digestive derivative. He who supplies all our needs and offers us Grace and Mercy despite our best efforts to be our own little gods gives us the Big Muffin.
How many times have you stood there behind that altar and broken the Big Muffin, intoning Paul's words and lifted the Big Cup continuing on and felt the shift in the universe because not just death, but the daily feeding of our souls was overcome by that sacrifice. I hope often. I hope it's not about you doing the giving, but you modelling receiving.
That Muffin IS Big. Bigger than we could ask or imagine. It is a Muffin, full of the air of the Holy Spirit and the promise that we are a forgiven people. How is it fresh to you when you serve it?
All the theological debates and the use of wafers or pita or crackers or big chunks of white bread do not distract from the eternal reality it's a Big Muffin. And we wash it down with a slurp from the Big Cup, whether it's the sweet tang of juice that grabs our tastebuds at the side of our cheeks or the burning of wine as it slips down our throats.
If we forget post modern or emerging or digital , and simply tell them, it's a Big Muffin enough for all of us to eat. It doesn't stick in our throats and our mouths and we don't have to chew because it is followed by the slurp from the Big Cup, it is enough. They will get it.
Many mornings they eat a muffin and a hot drink. They get it that eating something like that is comfort and joy and hope and promise. Real or essential. They get it. Start there maybe when you are explaining. Start with the Big Muffin and the Big Cup. Start with what they know. Jesus did.
Love
Deborah
With all the second grade inquisitiveness she could muster, one of the little angels who belonged to another church turned quickly to me and asked, "What's the big muffin for?"
She is the one who always volunteers to pray and displays all the authentic desire to be connected and in conversation with God she can muster.
Distracted by my last minute duties to the choir , I turned to see what she was talking about.
There it sat. The communion loaf.
"Ah...the Big Muffin" I exclaimed inwardlywith a joyful sigh of relief in my heart as I realized it was communion Sunday. "We will eat in later in the service as a reminder that Jesus loves us" I explained simply.
Her nomenclature of the most sacred metaphor of God's sacrifice for us reminded me how much I love conversing with new or non believers about faith and the elements of faith. We are so wedded to church culture and churchspeak and church tradition, we forget the uninitiated can sometimes bring the sharpest clarity to our faith.
The Big Muffin, indeed. That's what he died for. So we could eat the Big Muffin. Every time we eat the Big Muffin and slurp the Big Cup, we humble ourselves to the digestive derivative. He who supplies all our needs and offers us Grace and Mercy despite our best efforts to be our own little gods gives us the Big Muffin.
How many times have you stood there behind that altar and broken the Big Muffin, intoning Paul's words and lifted the Big Cup continuing on and felt the shift in the universe because not just death, but the daily feeding of our souls was overcome by that sacrifice. I hope often. I hope it's not about you doing the giving, but you modelling receiving.
That Muffin IS Big. Bigger than we could ask or imagine. It is a Muffin, full of the air of the Holy Spirit and the promise that we are a forgiven people. How is it fresh to you when you serve it?
All the theological debates and the use of wafers or pita or crackers or big chunks of white bread do not distract from the eternal reality it's a Big Muffin. And we wash it down with a slurp from the Big Cup, whether it's the sweet tang of juice that grabs our tastebuds at the side of our cheeks or the burning of wine as it slips down our throats.
If we forget post modern or emerging or digital , and simply tell them, it's a Big Muffin enough for all of us to eat. It doesn't stick in our throats and our mouths and we don't have to chew because it is followed by the slurp from the Big Cup, it is enough. They will get it.
Many mornings they eat a muffin and a hot drink. They get it that eating something like that is comfort and joy and hope and promise. Real or essential. They get it. Start there maybe when you are explaining. Start with the Big Muffin and the Big Cup. Start with what they know. Jesus did.
Love
Deborah
Tuesday, February 17, 2009
On and Off Pastors Between Little and Big
Here we are just a week away from Big Lent and it seems like we only just finished with little lent ( advent). Was there a sigh of relief as you enjoyed that week between Christmas and New Year's ? Finally, a chance to let down.
How often do you get to let down? Does the twenty four seven of being 'on' just wear the love lights out of you? Hmmmmmm...
Thirty some years ago, I read a piece of research stating most ministers/pastors are in their positions because it affords them the social distance they need between people to be comfortable in their skin. Seems most people in the ministry had been peacemakers as children feeling more affinity with adults than their peers. Hmmmmmmmmm...
That discovery, that research, sent me on a three decade journey to discover what it means to be shepherding rather than leading out of a genuine faith in Jesus Christ rather than a love of church culture.
I've watched the times change. Women have come into the full time paid ministry big time. Megachurchs have populated the lives of ordinary people with lingo and scripture quotes and catchy praise tunes and small groups. But the challenge remains as it has for thousands of years, to surrender one's heart to God in three persons on a daily basis, before we check our dayrunners.
Can it be? Can the run of the mill pastor trained in seminary feeling an urge to serve the church or missions operate out of the heart and still be a 'good' pastor in all ways administrative and didactic. Hmmmmmm.
Between this time of little and big, think of on and off. Staying engaged with God at all times is different than engaging with the people we serve in the buildings in which we live. Lo these many years later, denominational loyalty and particular church culture rides longer and stronger than those moments of complete and utter surrender.
Maybe there's another way. Hmmmmmm.
Love
Deborah
How often do you get to let down? Does the twenty four seven of being 'on' just wear the love lights out of you? Hmmmmmm...
Thirty some years ago, I read a piece of research stating most ministers/pastors are in their positions because it affords them the social distance they need between people to be comfortable in their skin. Seems most people in the ministry had been peacemakers as children feeling more affinity with adults than their peers. Hmmmmmmmmm...
That discovery, that research, sent me on a three decade journey to discover what it means to be shepherding rather than leading out of a genuine faith in Jesus Christ rather than a love of church culture.
I've watched the times change. Women have come into the full time paid ministry big time. Megachurchs have populated the lives of ordinary people with lingo and scripture quotes and catchy praise tunes and small groups. But the challenge remains as it has for thousands of years, to surrender one's heart to God in three persons on a daily basis, before we check our dayrunners.
Can it be? Can the run of the mill pastor trained in seminary feeling an urge to serve the church or missions operate out of the heart and still be a 'good' pastor in all ways administrative and didactic. Hmmmmmm.
Between this time of little and big, think of on and off. Staying engaged with God at all times is different than engaging with the people we serve in the buildings in which we live. Lo these many years later, denominational loyalty and particular church culture rides longer and stronger than those moments of complete and utter surrender.
Maybe there's another way. Hmmmmmm.
Love
Deborah
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